Posted in Looking Ahead, Posts

Everyone is LEAVING

The other night, I went to a party at a friends, which was the last gathering of their group of 25ish friends, plus some others (like me and my friends). I really had such a good night, I got about 3 hours sleep because we stayed over, we danced to old songs and those songs that everyone knows the moves to, played games like Mafia, and it was just SO MUCH FUN. At the end of it, though, people walked out that door and I had a sudden realisation that I’m never going to see most of those people again. 

The people I care about, I’ll stay in touch with. Even if we drift apart, we’ll still try to start off with. I know some friendships will last a while, and some will fall apart almost straight away. They aren’t the ones I’m worried about, though. It’s the people that I barely ever talk to, but they’re still a big part of my life, generally just in little ways. 

Let’s take my ex, for example. We started off being bffs in year 9, we dated through year 10, we hated each other in year 11, we had a strange “are we friends or enemies?” thing in year 12, and in year 13 we were happy to sit and talk to each other, although we didn’t all that much. The point is, he was always something, from the very first day when I laughed/related to him for dropping the Fruit Burst our form teacher threw at him. As a person, I’m not particularly going to miss him. I maybe regret not staying friends with him, but we didn’t, and there’s nothing I can do to change that now. But I’m NEVER GOING TO SEE HIM AGAIN. I’m moving, he’s… Moving? Staying? I don’t know? The point is, this person who I’ve been seeing every single day of my life for five years is just disappearing, and I’ll have no idea what he’s up to.

This is my year 9 class taken in year 13 – I’m NEVER SEEING THEM AGAIN

Same goes for my whole ex group of friends – the girl who knew every part of me better than anyone else in the world, the girl who painted my nails all the time because she was great and I was terrible, the boy I had a crush on but who was secretly gay, etc etc. We’re not close enough to stay friends, because our friend group happened to fall apart halfway through high school. There’s no hard feelings, we have a lot of mutual friends, or classes together, and we often sit together and have a good chat. I don’t tell them every single secret, but I can’t forget that that girl once knew my every little secret, and I knew all of hers. There are things you just can’t forget, no matter how many years pass. Again, I see these people every single day, and all of sudden I just… won’t. It’s so much different to the end of a friendship, because we’re not especially close. That won’t make it any less strange, though. 

Basically, I keep disappearing off this blog for ages, then come back with a lot of emotions, and it’s a very weird thing. I’m just moving out soon, and am simultaneously excited and terrified. This is yet another thing that drives home how weird it is that I’m actually really leaving, and high school is over, and being a child is over. Ahhhhh. 


I was a book blogger for a while, and I now blog about every little thing in life I can think of. Bear with me while I try all these new posts out... I'm a New Zealand teen who gets angry about the world (but not angry enough for tumblr). I like to capture the world through photos and words, and read in all the moments in nz-squadbetween. I have an overwhelming desire to see every corner of the world I possibly can, and hug the people I love in all those corners. I can't do make up to save myself, and you're more likely to find me buying matching stationary than matching clothes. My nerd hobbies include a new found love of the Avengers, reading YA, watching Game of Thrones, How I Met Your Mother, and every vlogger I can find, and being the last person on the music bandwagons. I have big plans for the rest of my life, including university, teaching, travelling, and having an army of puppies. I plan to blog every second of it!

13 thoughts on “Everyone is LEAVING

  1. This post is so relatable!
    My school ends in 2 months and I feel like I’m not going to miss my group of friends as much as I will miss everyone else. Because I’m definitely going to stay in touch with them for as long as possible even if we don’t talk on a daily basis but it’s the other people who are not exactly my friends but it was comforting to see them everyday. Those are the people who I was surrounded by while so much happened in my life so it’ll just be so weird without them. :/

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Ahh I keep having the realisation that in a year’s time, I’ll be having my last few months at college and I probably won’t see the friends I’ve made at college of or at all once we’re all at uni! It’s sad because I’ve only just started college and made new friends, but because we only stay at college for two years, it feels like I’ll barely get to know them properly before we leave!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I mean, you can always try and stay in touch with people once you’ve all left! But it’s definitely harder when it’s only a few years, and it’ll be strange having to start all over again with feeling like the new kid who doesn’t know anyone

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That’s true! Yeah it will be weird, but then I guess at uni everyone is pretty much in the same boat as there’s a small chance you’ll be going to the same uni as your friends (or it least in the UK anyway as we have loads of uni’s 😂😂)

        Liked by 1 person

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