Last week, I did my first book discussion! I really liked it, so look forward to another it next week 🙂 I talked about the “perfect” guy, and what that means in books. I asked you if that changes your view on real-life guys. If you didn’t read the post, have a look over here.
You responded really well to this! Here are your thoughts:
“Seeing those flaws makes me like their dynamic with the love of their life. I don’t think we find “the perfect guy” in books attractive because of who he is or what he does in general. It’s that he knows what to do to make the girl feel special, which makes him perfect for that specific female character.
And I don’t think that’s a terrible thing. Wanting to find someone who understands you and what you like and how to make that a reality for you isn’t a bad thing. And it’s why the projection from the protagonist to the reader works. We want to find someone who will do that thing that made the protag all gushy inside.
My one complaint about “the perfect guy” is that sometimes they are written such that the female doesn’t have to reciprocate. And I find that crazy. The point of a relationship is that it is a mutual affection. So when I read about “a perfect guy” I look at the relationship he maintains with his partner. How do they talk? How do they help and support each other? When they fight, how do they resolve it? What do they do for each other? And most importantly: how real is it?”
“I think it’s great to have high expectations, but I think it’s also a good idea for one to get their head out of the clouds too. I don’t think that writers should get rid of the perfect characters because for girls with completely average boyfriends (compared to boys in books) or girls that don’t even have boyfriends they need the perfect guys to mentally date haha!”
“My fiancé is literally the polar opposite of the fictional men I tend to gravitate towards (and develop unhealthy obsessions over… ). However, I (obviously) love my fiancé to death, even though I wouldn’t love him as a character in a book.”
“I don’t necessarily believe in the “perfect” person but instead in the perfect person for you. That one person who gets you, who understands your quirks even if they don’t necessarily find them adorable every second of every day. The person who can put up with you when you’re insanely happy about something that seems trivial or insanely bummed out because of something that seems trivial. The person that you want to tell good news to first and be the first to share a hug with when it’s been a bad day (for either of you!)”
This is what I love about blogging. You all brought up points I hadn’t thought about it, and hopefully I did the same for you. I don’t know if I’ll be doing this wrap-up type thing after my discussions. But it’s interesting to read your thoughts, so send me more of them!